This story is presented as written. As such, views expressed below are the personal opinion of the author. Health systems are complex places to navigate for everyone working and existing within them; stories are presented to help find ways forward – and to reduce shame, not shift it.

Author wishes to remain anonymous

It has taken 14 years for CAMHS to finally diagnose my son with ASD and ADHD. But it all came too late as his secondary education was already ruined and so was our home life, as we did not get the diagnosis earlier so weren’t eligible for help or support from anyone.

Social services were absolutely useless and a shambles! parenting courses were a waste of time. He was heavily medicated, but the medications caused him to become worse and severely anxious, depressed and violent towards the family members, which resulted in his arrest.

My son still suffers now, and he’s in his mid 20s. I have also been fighting to get my daughter diagnosed as well for the last 10 years (yet again!) but now they’re even stricter and refuse to put her through for an assessment! She severely self harms due to her ongoing battle with anxiety and frustrations and depression and everyday is a damn hard struggle for her!

I now homeschool her due to how bad things were in school for her when trying to learn. She was also bullied for being different and called a weirdo! Disgusting behaviour. CAMHS know of all of this and have had countless reports from myself and other family members as to how my daughter is, her coping mechanisms, her everyday emotional struggles and support that she constantly needs.

She’s always on a so-called watch to help her avoid self harming or in case her threats of suicide were to be acted upon! She is under 13! But CAMHS think she doesn’t need to be mentally assessed?

I have now looked into going private and it’s £3k plus!! How are people meant to afford this, especially if they have more than one child that needs assessing?

Something has to change with CAMHS and they need to listen to the parents more. After all, we are the ones that know our kids best and know when something’s not right with them!

Children need to be listened to too if they are able to communicate, and need to be listened to and taken seriously. And [there can’t be] just one meeting for them to decide it’s fine to discharge a child.

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